Tuesday, January 25, 2005

 

123 More Years of Manhood

Wisconsin prisons are allegedly practicing cruel and unusual punishment, by not giving prisoners opportunities to have sex changes while incarcerated, following their hormone treatments which make them more womanly. I think it's cruel and unusual to give them the hormone treatment which makes them grow breasts, lose hair, and generally look more womanly. It isn't cruel to the prisoners as much as it is to the taxpayers of Wisconsin who have to see their hard-earned dollars go to this therapy. That's right, taxpayers are footing the bill. This is going on in CA as well. From what I hear from people who work at a central valley prison near my home, they are flying a prisoner to LA periodically to undergo sex change operations, payed for by California taxpayers. Canada has decided that it's prisons should offer the "essential" operation as well, to any transies who ask for it. I think, if your a prisoner of the state, I'm sorry, but you should remain a "prisoner of your body as well." I don't care how uncomfortable it makes you feel. Call me heartless, but you can get your genitals swapped when you get free. If you are Scott "Donna Dawn" Konitzer, and your won't be freed for another 123 years, well you should have thought ahead and not committed multiple armed robberies. Stabbing fellow inmates doesnt help either. As it is, your half and half stage isn't going to help you make your case with the parole board, so you might as well accept your crotch for what it is, and stop suing the state because you were born a man.

Thursday, January 20, 2005

 

Freak Show!

Masses of people turned out this morning to see Bush take the presidential oath again. Okay who are we kidding, they could have gotten a better view of that on TV, they were there for the freak show! [cue circus music] That's right! Step right up! Freaks from all over this great nation working to make the point that they are against President Bush, and that they can be annoying! See the clowns as they try to show you their displeasure with the president and anything he says, does or touches! Freaks of all ages and sizes here for your enjoyment as they disturb the peace, all in the name of peace! See them gather and spew their comic rhetoric. This stuff is too hot for TV folks, you simply have to be there! Catch the amazing pyrotechnics as they simultaneously insult the very country that puts them onstage for the world to see! If you missed this freak show, do not fear! For whenever our president speaks anywhere, they will be there to preform their civil liberties, and you can be there to point and stare, they don't care!

*Warning- Freaks are for entertainment purposes only. They are not to be taken seriously in any fashion.

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

 

Kaboom!

Our economy is booming, I don't care what anyone else says. Jobless claims fell more than anyone expected, the biggest drop in three years. Unemployment is going back down, and good paying-white collar jobs are being created, about 157,000 came last month. Our economy is getting stronger according to the Fed beige book. I think that means interest rates are rising, but I don't know, that story doesn't sit well with my economics A.D.D.. There is good news coming to us from C.N.N.. Factory jobs are paying better, evidently. Oil is back down below $47 a barrel. So we can afford to drive our SUV's again. Hawaii is spending $2 Million to try and deal with little frogs that are driving them up the wall. And the Harvard "chief" is backtracking after apparently making a remark alluding to differences in the genes of men and women that might possibly make it harder for women to master math and science. Of course we can't take that as a complement to women mathemeticians and scientists, after all, it was merely a blatant attempt to demoralize female students and reinforce a glass ceiling. That's what his job as a white male is. It would only be a compliment coming from a woman. I don't know what happened to my economy post, it kinda got steamrollered by my A.D.D. after I saw the frogs. After all, frogs are way more interesting than economic policy.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

 

Iraq's Secret Weapon

This was posted on Drudge today. I was giddy when I read it because it explained my thoughts very eloquently. If you ever wondered what weapon Iraqi terror thugs could possibly have up their sleeves with which to defeat the United States, this article will explain it to you. This weapon is targeted squarely at U.S. civilians all across the country, and we are all hit with it whenever we flip on the morning or evening news. The media is terrorism's only hope for victory of any sort in Iraq. Without the media their car bombs, suicide bombers, and gutless tactics would have little impact on the overall course of the war. As it is, insurgents continue to blow up innocent civs and enjoying the glory, knowing that Americans will get a full report of each of their victories, without hearing a word on their own country has accomplished. We may be wiping the table with them on the ground, but if Iraq manages to win the psychological side of the war, this thing could stll go south. Whether it is due to laziness, stupidity, or outright treason, the media is their greatest ally. I still don't think it is enough to grind down the American resolve, and hope that the credibility of American media is what gives way first.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

 

Kids Do The Darndest Things

Ahh Young love. I'm sure we all remember the 1st, grade. Playing four square at recess, doing arts and crafts in school, trying to have sex under the stairwell. Okay, I never really experienced that last part either, but here's two childrens that will be able to say they have.

"IPS police and Marion County child protection workers are investigating an incident involving two first-graders who officials said were caught trying to have sex Wednesday at an Eastside school."

Now I guess the important question here is, was the young lad wearing protection. And if not, why wasn't there a bowl full of condoms handy, so he wouldn't leave the house unprepared. Sure you can make the argument that neither child is old enough to physically become a biological parent, but everyone knows it's best to start good habits at a young age. I mean if we are gonna go through with this oversexualizing the youth thing, we might as well be covering all of the bases. That way if a little boy happens to pass them all we won't have quite as big of a mess on our hands. If you ask me, 1st grade is a little young, but what do I know. After all, I am a conservative.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

 

Proverbs 13:24

Keep those rotten children in line with "The Rod!" This lightweight, flexible nylon rod delivers a stinging blow to any loudmouthed little brat who dares to challenge your authority. The Rod is the perfect whipping tool, and the $4.99 will pay for itself over and over again. Remember:

''Spoons are for cooking, belts are for holding up pants, hands are for loving, and rods are for chastening."

Here is what Christian Parents think about "The Rod"

Here is what the folks at www.neverhitachild.org think about "The Rod"

Here is what Black People think about "The Rod"

If you are looking to purchase your own "The Rod," you'll have to find your own copy of Home School Digest. Sorry, I looked, but I couldn't find a website to purchase one online. I'm sure they are out there, but they are probably designed for spanking a little bit older clientelle.


Monday, January 10, 2005

 

Monday Stew 2005

Well vacation is over, and now is the time for getting back into the swing of things. As we are paying of Christmas bills and breaking New Year's Resolutions, we look forward to another exciting year of news that will intrigue us, enlighten us, and probably bore us to death. For example East Timor is donating $50,000 to Tsunami victims, even though they are one of the poorest countries in the world. Thats nice of them. Scientists found the biggest stars in the universe. They will probably explode soon, so we can expect to see a pretty cool spectacle in the next couple thousand years. CBS News is all over the place, firing their fallmen in a desperate attempt to save their ratings. This crazy guy grabbed onto the spoiler of his car as it was being stolen. He went for quite a ride, reaching speeds of up to 80 miles per hour, and swerving back and forth... Wow, I want to try that sometime. In other news, churches are drawing in God's people with Humvees now. I'm for it. God calls people to be fishers of men, and fishing is always better when you drive a Hummer. Because they can go anywhere. Oh, and apparently Jews and Americans are responsible for the tsunamis. Go figure.