Monday, December 05, 2005


Monday Stew

Britain is allowing "Civil Partnerships" for gay couples. Elton John immediately jumped on that. The EU's budget apparently hit new Eastern European member countries pretty hard. I guess they were expecting more of a handout from the magical western money faries. I don't know where they got that idea. Back in the U.S., Indianapolis is ruling the country, and the University of Reggie Bush is bearing it's teeth at the Longhorns after wiping the floor with its cross-town rivals. Besides football, little else has happened. The most bogus charges against Tom Delay have been dropped and it looks like his troubles are just beginning. Abdel Hamden, a muslim and owner of a liquor store in Oakland has had his shop vandalized and set on fire. Shortly after he was kidnapped, and now more of his stuff has been looted. No word if this most recent incident was perpetrated by the same Muslim Brotherhood that has been troubling him over the last week, but I have a hunch that this guy's troubles are also just beginning. It looks like we get to deal with Hugo Chavez for another eight years, unless he decides to extend term limits, in which case it will be longer. Chavez has all the charm of a flatulent Chihuahua, and it showed in the overwhelming support he recieved from the less than 25% of Venezuelan voters that actually showed up to vote. The death toll due to homicides in my home state of California for 2004 was 2,394 in case you were curious. World Net Daily compared it to 904 deaths in the same year for coalition forces in Iraq. There are alot more people on the streets of Oakland and central Los Angeles than there are coalition forces in Iraq, but it's a worthy comparison nonetheless. Saddam Hussein says he's not afraid of being executed. See? The death penalty is a lousy deterrent for brutal totalitarian dictators. I say lock him up in a room with Clay Aiken's debut album, Measure of a Man, running nonstop until he dies of natural causes. Force him to wear pink pantyhose an a leather tunic, then set up a webcam that is broadcast on a CIA sponsored television station all over the Middle East and you'll have your effective deterrent, and maybe a new hit reality series that is just tasteless enough to be picked up by FOX. Kara-Beth Borden and double-murderer Ludwig's MySpace accounts are either replaced or inaccessible now, so you can't go flame them and their friends with beligerent comments, but her profile can still be seen here. Her number one interest? "JESUS!!" The Neorest toilet from Toto is out on the market now. It boasts remote-controlled seat temperature and bidet functions, and the lid automatically lifts up on your approach. So far, sales of the $5000 toilet have been lackluster and they have mostly been going to Europeans and the elderly. That's because it doesn't have the one thing any new device needs to succeed, a Broadband connection. If I am going to flush 5 G's down the toilet, I want to be able to do it from anywhere in the world. Even a USB port would have done the trick, but it looks like we'll have to wait a little while for that luxury yet.

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